pretty bottle tree
ooo kitty baby! I can't wait to hug her!
Oh!
And poor Gus!! I wish I could hug him too, poor little broken baby.
(my mom hit him with the car and now he has a broken hip and sleeps in my room. send love his way, so he heals faster. This works according to my yoga teacher - she makes us concentrate on classmate's injuries and then we heal them by sending love to their injury. Send love to my mom too, because she is very sad and hurt that it happened, even though it was an accident.)
peach trees and the blue ridge mountains
Spring time is so beautiful at home - but I won't be missing it, I come home soon.
Mark your calendars - Allyn will be back on American soil May 6th.
Then she'll be taking off to Thailand for the month of June to do ethnographic field work, so you are gonna have to catch her fast if you are going to try and catch her.
She's had a taste of other things and other lands and other ideas and other people and from now on, plans on being very hard to catch because she will be doing so many other things in other places.
I was talking with my Hindi tutor (he says "only" as "onely" and can't say "v's" as in "vowel." So he says "wowel" and I can't help but laugh every time) and he told me that around the last 15-20 days of the semester, everyone gets all depressed and stops talking and doing anything because they just want to be home, and they can taste comfort food and smell clean air, etc. etc. Sounds depressing.
And a waste of the last 15-20 days of a stay in India. I know I have my homesickish days... strangely enough, they are few and far between. Everyone was so surprised that I was following through with my decision to go to India for so long, as if I couldn't do it, or as if I am a homebody.
Do not get me wrong - I love my beautiful home and my wonderful family and all of the things that I just want to wrap up in a quilt and throw over my body every night, to sleep covered in love and happiness, but I am not naturally a homesick person.
Despite what they and their parents thought, I never went to friends houses because the parents were so picky, so decisive, so deadline-ish, and so... in charge. I mean, my parents made me sit at the table until I finished my banana and forced me to practice piano... but they trusted me and let me dress myself and choose my activities and decide on my own what was good or bad for me, offering help and opinions and doling out punishment where necessary, but ultimately letting me grow up a well rounded, not super naive kid.
I'm not a homebody, although I am very close with my family and love when I am with them and that will never, ever, ever change.
So here I am - 6 weeks left in India and I'm ok with that. Am I ready? Haven't really thought about it until now.
I've been here for 3 months now, and the only thing I want from home is hugs and love and laughter, which I know will always be there (and I know I will always want them).
I have come to appreciate home in a different way since being away. Growing up, SC was a hellhole lacking any type of opportunity but not rednecks and poor education. I still despise SC for reasons such as these, but now I can see the beauty of the South.
The South is full of history and relics and tradition. The idea of the Old South still appeals to me, southern bells and large plantations, good manners and great southern, relaxed style that is reflected in everything. I have my mountains and I have the sea and 4 beautiful seasons. I have cobblestone streets and large families that pick pecans together at Thanksgiving. There is heritage and delicious home made, secret family recipe food. There is hospitality like no other and boiled peanuts, farmer's markets and actual farmers. My grandmother calls me Precious Darling Angel Baby with a classic southern drawl and there are sun soaked wrap around porches and fields large enough for horses to run wild, free and happy with the wind.
I always wanted change, and more more more from where I was. It never offered enough. But I don't need it to offer me anything anymore. I need it, and love it, for what it is, the memories I have there, and what it is made of.
That said, I can't wait until my next trip. I'll be in Thailand in 2 months, then one year until I graduate from college and then who knows.
As long as I think about how exciting and how big the world is and all of the places I have to go and all of the things I have to do, I don't get so panicky about not having a clue what to do with a resume full of Anthropology, Dance and Religious Studies.
I'm glad I made the world and her beautiful people my job.
I'll admit, though. Sometimes I get teary when I think about my airport pickup moment, when I see my family for the first time in 4 months. It is going to be a very happy moment.
I get happy tears and a huge smile on my face just thinking about it.
Am I ready to be home?
Not yet - I still have so much to do and I don't know when I will ever have the chance to do it again.
I'm gearing myself up for how much I am going to miss being in India, because this is an amazing place full of things that I will never know at home.
But I will be ready to be home as soon as I hear that I should buckle my seat belt because we are about to land at the Atlanta Airport.
Sorry for the mushy post, but I was just thinking about it all.
